He was a big fellow with a disfiguring paunch totally inappropriate for man of his tender years. That same rotund belly was pounding relentlessly into the soft, defenseless flanks of one of the petite nuns from the car behind me. It seemed unnecessary to comment on the fact that the poor woman was totally distraught but still fairly quiet about the indignity. I assumed it was because she didn’t want to share the circumstances of her degradation with anyone in the vicinity if at all possible. I could understand her distress but thought it unwise because her screams would have roused some of the more well-behaved males from their disinterest to intervene on her behalf.I simply walked up behind the laboring hulk of a man and laid him out with a blow across the side of his head with my long-barreled handgun just as neat as squashing a pesky bug too close to my grub.The grateful, but obviously in shock, black frocked female quickly pulled her robes back down hiding the sight of her. "I might have known!" she said angrily. "How long have you been wearingmy panties? Look, as you are determined to look like a woman, you hadbetter put this cream on!"She started furiously rubbing a smelly green cream all over my arms, legsback and chest. I was, once more, the startled rabbit caught in theheadlights and although I made an initial attempt to stop her, she had bythen done most my back and chest by that time. At that point I rememberthinking, "Oh well, in for a penny, in for a pound. How will this foulsmelling cream make me look more feminine anyway?" and I let her rub therest of this stuff over the remainder of my chest and back and arms andlegs. I even told her she had missed a bit.Then I stood there covered in this smelly green cream. She had usedseveral tubes of it on me!"So how feminine do I look?" I asked in a conciliatory and submissivetone.Then the penny dropped. This was hair removal cream! She had well andtruly got me! I reached for the shower to try to.
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